My Jerry Blavat Story

( #JerryBlavat, #Philadelphia )

I came across this post mentioning that Jerry Blavat now has a blog. For the lucky masses unaware of Blavat’s existence, Jerry is semi-famous Philadelphia disk jockey during the 1960s (and 70s?). The reason I am mentioning any of this is that I had a run in with this guy almost a decade ago at a charity event. Since his blog wants some stories, here is mine:

My tale takes place somewhere between 2003 or 2004. The setting was at a very nice Philadelphia hotel (near the Art Museum). The hotel was hosting a charity event that had something to do with Italian Americans and donations to Washington. Thanks to my father and his employer’s involvement in said charity, several tickets were purchased and I was offered a spot at the table. Having become newly single, I thought this would be an interesting place to meet women.

The crowd leaned towards the older side, but that was to be expected. That said, women my age were most definitely in attendance. Eventually I managed to break the ice with a girl near one of the carving stations (I remember because I made a comment that I was avoiding anything that would drip all over me). I started to notice an old man intently inspecting the carving station (the girl’s back was to the roast and to the older gentlemen).

This man then turns around and starts staring at my new friend’s ass. Right in front of me. No shame. He makes eye contact with me—then goes right back to looking at the girl’s ass. He then creeps over and asks what her name is (no “excuse me”, more like “hey, what’s your name”). Seeing this coming, I watch the girl to capture her reaction. She was definitely caught off guard. I could tell she was trying to figure out if I knew him. So I decide to get a little playful myself and cut him off and say “Sir—that wasn’t very nice to jump into our conversation, why don’t you introduce yourself first.”

Stupid me—I gave Jerry the opening he was hoping for. “I’m Jerry Blavat.” No reaction from either the young lady or myself (prior to this evening I had never heard of Jerry and I grew up in South Philadelphia). He sees that his name did not make the intended connection, so he then offers “the geator with the heator.” Zero reaction. I could sense that Mr. Blavat’s pride was wounded, but he made no attempts at retreat. He continued to pummel this young girl with standard stalker questions: “What school did you go to?” (she had graduated 2 years earlier), “where do you work?” and then starts in with “are you with this guy?”

Are you fucking kidding me?

My new friend said no, we had just met—he then turns around and tells me to go get him a drink. I respond with something along the lines of “I hope you are joking.” He wasn’t. I then said something like “I think you had too much to drink buddy, plus I think it is past your bed time.” This amped up “the geator” and he gave me some kind of jab about the younger generation having no respect to which I responded that he didn’t seem to have any respect interrupting our conversation. At this point, my would-be lady friend politely excused herself. I shot Jerry a death stare and mumbled several curses under my breath as I walked away.

As I approached the bar, my mother intercepted me and informed me that I was speaking with THE Jerry Blavat. I ask her how she knew him, and she gives me the he’s “the geator with the heater” line. I look at her at ask “what the hell does that even mean?” I don’t remember her answer, but she proceeds to ask what we talked about, and I just said, “not much, but that guy is an asshole.”

Mr. Blavat may be a respected DJ, and a member of the Philadelphia elite, but to me—he is just an old cock-blocker.

Concert Review: Chris Isaak @ Longwood Gardens (Philadelphia Area)

( #ChrisIsaak, #LongwoodGardens, #ConcertReview )

Opening Act: Marc Broussard
Main Event: Chris Isaak
Location: Longwood Gardens, Kennett Square, Pa (Philadelphia Area)
Date: Tuesday, July 13th, 2010

[Venue]

I have never been to Longwood Gardens before and wasn’t sure what to expect in regards to a rock and roll show; I discovered Longwood Gardens is a great place to see a concert. The grounds are beautiful, the staff is really nice, and there wasn’t a bad seat in the house (or botanical garden in this case). The concert stage was situated right in front of a big fountain which added a nice backdrop to the show.

[Opening Act]

My friends were very happy that Marc Broussard was listed as the opening act, so that amped up my expectations of this singer. Sadly, instead of the rough and rowdy blues act (that my friends had witnessed a few years ago), Marc focused on generic ballads (yawn).

The last song was a swampy blues number which was absolutely the best of the set. It’s a shame Broussard decided to leave his nuts backstage, because the guy is talented and has a great band, just lame material this time around.

[Chris Isaak]

Chris Isaak put on a fucking show tonight. The weather was hot and sticky, but that didn’t slow down this seasoned performer. Isaak walked on stage with a neon pink sequined jump suit: that’s hell of a statement to make in this heat.

The backing band was fantastic. All of these guys can play well and fill out the sound on the stage. Music aside, they all seem to have a really good time playing to the crowd and goofing around. Chris leaned on the whole band to to dance, shake, act as a 60’s soul back-up singers, and an “olde-time” church revival… let’s just say these cats were versitile.

Isaak immediately won the crowd over with his banter and high energy. He showed no fear in knocking out his trademark high notes several times per song. All of his popular tunes sounded note perfect (“Somebody’s Crying”, “Wicked Game”, “Forever Blue”, “Bad Bad Thing”). My favorite line of the night is when he remarked on the heat by saying “I am sweating more than a whore in church.” Damn right.

For the encore, Isaak decided to take his sweating up a notch by donning a mirrored suit (it had to weigh at least 30-40 lbs). He last few tunes were very high energy including a great rendition of the Roy Orbison classic “Pretty Woman” (he sounded exactly like Orbison). A fantastic show by a great performer; other musicians should go see Isaak and take notes – this is how you do rock and roll baby!

Movie Review: Hot Tub Time Machine

Six weeks ago, I saw a commercial for a promotional website for the movie “Hot Tub Time Machine” (Kicksomepast.com); the commercial mentioned getting a free screening of the movie for you and some friends. I quickly went to the site and I actually got the free passes. Since then, I have been doubting if these promo tickets were legit, and I was worried about asking my friends to show up on a Monday night to a theater in the city and we would get turned away. That didn’t happen. Not only did the Ritz honor the Eventful promotion – we actually got a bunch of free stuff too.

While the premise of the movie was equally ridiculous yet hilarious sounding – I had my concerns that all of the good stuff would be showing in the trailer. Didn’t happen. Without giving too much away, the movie’s self-referential mocking was outstanding (how are you going to do a movie about the 80’s and skiing and not reference Cusack?). There is also a glorified cameo that will make lovers of time travel movies wet their pants. Was the script the next “Citizen Kane”? No. But it was one of the funnier comedies in the last 18 months. While I think the movie would have benefited from an original “Army of Darkness”-style ending, the neat little bow wrapped up at the end was satisfying.

This movie comes out March 26th. Go see it. Watch out for the squirrel.

Concert Review: The Cranberries @ The Electric Factory

Date: November 17th, 2009
Location: Philadelphia, Pa
Venue: The Electric Factory
Opening Act: Griffin House

[Opening Act: Griffin House]

I wish I could say something about Griffin House, but the man didn’t make much of an impression. He didn’t sound terrible and the music was pleasant enough. He just didn’t stand out: House sounds like every guy who ever picked up an acoustic guitar and made nice sounds. I will give him marks for attempting to engage the audience and making note that he was a fan of the cranberries when he was a teenager. It was a nice touch. He left the stage in a timely matter, not overstaying his welcome, and that’s it.

[Venue Information]

After Griffin House left the stage I remarked to my wife that the sound was very cloudy. It was hard to hear although the volume was fine. It just sounded washed out (music and talking). While that was a big issue, overall we had a good time at the Electric Factory. I have been there in the past and it had been hotter than hell, but it was very comfortable last night.

We ended up in the upper section by the bars, waiting for friends. I scouted the area and picked out a spot that gave us a clear view of the stage. We were close to the security guard: I mention this because the guy was EXCELLENT. Our clear view depended on people not standing in a restricted area; at another show, the guards would just let them creep over, but this guy was on the ball – ensuring our awesome view. On top of that, at one point in the night he gave my wife a stool to sit on (completely unprompted). He didn’t yell at people – he was polite but stern and he made my night way more enjoyable. On our way out I hooked him up with a tip because he restored my faith in standing room shows (positive reinforcement!). This guy was a total asset to the Electric Factory.

[The Cranberries]

The Cranberries came out very quickly (no 45 minute wait between sets). They began the show with a tune I recalled, but have no idea what the name was. When Dolores O’Riordan pointed the mic at the audience to sing, I realized that I really don’t know many Cranberries songs besides “Linger”, “Ode to My Family”, and “Zombie”.

Luckily for me, the band wasn’t stingy with their known songs. They mixed up the set well between slower and more rocking tunes. O’Riordan jumped and shimmed across the stage like a girl half her age (she is almost 40). Her voice sounded great (I noticed she was using an echo effect for many of the songs, which sounded cool), and she made an effort to connect with the Philadelphia crowd; I think she has family in the city but I couldn’t make out what she was saying. Good amount of chatter, but not too much.

The band sounded great, they obviously knew their way around the songs. Dolores played a few tunes from her solo album and the band provided back up. The new material sounded good, but not mind blowing. I decided once they played “Zombie” I was going to leave and beat the crowd out. Before we left, we heard an excellent version of “Salvation” – I had completely forgotten that song. Soon enough “Zombie” was played and we said good night to our friends and left.

[Conclusion]

I had an excellent time at the show: The band sounded great, the employees at the venue exceeded their job function to enhance my concert going experience, and I got home a decent time… which is good because I had to cancel my day off today. I will leave you as I left the venue last night: